posted by K | filed under Adoption | 2 Comments

I’m very happy to be pregnant. Very, very happy. But still, there are moments when I think about G and am very sad. The other day in the car, the song “Maybe (Reprise)” from the movie Annie came on my iPod, the version from near the end of the movie, when Rooster and Lily St. [...]

posted by K | filed under Adoption, Misfortune | 6 Comments

Bought two pairs of shoes. Ate fried chicken, waffle fries, and a Chik-fil-A milkshake. The cashier’s name at Chik-Fil-A was Greg. Of course it was. Could it have been anything else? Threw up milkshake because head hurt so bad from crying. Slept 12 hours. It is morning, and life still sucks. I am numb and [...]

posted by K | filed under Adoption, Misfortune | 9 Comments

G’s father will not be signing the papers. Today he had a visit scheduled with G and served J papers saying he is suing her for custody of G. His timing could not be worse for deciding to give a shit. I don’t know what to do with myself. I am wandering around the house [...]

posted by K | filed under Adoption, Family, Infertility, Misfortune | 4 Comments

Thursday, August 27 was a significant day here. A few minutes before 6 p.m., D’s beloved Uncle Ronnie died. Two hours later, my teenage cousin’s baby was born, a baby that could’ve been ours but probably won’t be. It was a long, sad, complicated weekend to end a long, sad, complicated month. Uncle Ronnie’s funeral [...]

posted by K | filed under Adoption, Infertility | 4 Comments

I’m not pregnant. Again. As usual. I’m not really surprised – after roughly 69 months in a row of not being pregnant (since I stopped birth control in November 2003), who can be surprised? Devastated, yes, but never surprised. I have an appointment with the doc on Monday to find out what we’ll do for [...]